Raise Your Glass and Celebrate!!!!!

Wow, it has been a busy 3 weeks since I finished my chemotherapy.(  I just LOVE saying that.)  The first couple of weeks was rough....exhaustion, pain, extreme neuropathy.  Slowly, I can tell a difference in my physical ability.  Walking is still very hard.  BUT, that did not stop me from an amazing family vacation last week to St. Louis and Chicago.  A lot of walking was involved, and I survived.  I was slow and spent a lot of time in bed at night, but I managed to walk the St Louis zoo and then all over Chicago with the boys.  I missed nothing.  This time last year we would have done so much more, but I am so happy for being able to participate and for what we did do. 

So now I sit at the computer with a glass of wine and good chocolate to celebrate with all of my loyal and loving followers.  Today was a BIG day for me....I had a PET scan to determine if the chemotherapy worked it's magic and if I was cancer free or had other cancers forming elsewhere.  I have been very nervous and upset about this test.  I just could not accept any answer other that I was CANCER FREE.  Lucky for me, that is exactly what my doctor told me.  The PET scan came back clear and good.  Add that to the fact that my mastectomy was successful in eradicating all the cancer cells in my  breast makes me ONE HEALTHY WOMAN WITH NO CANCER!!!!!!

I am not out of the woods yet, but I am in a very happy place right now.  I will go back in 4 months for another recheck.  The first five years post chemo are my highest likely hood of another cancer forming so I have to be checked several times a year.  Knowing this test came back clear gives me such hope for a future without cancer.  It is hard to imagine yet amazing to be at this point.  This has been the hardest year of my life.  I only have uphill to go from here and I look forward to that.  Now I have to get more strength back to get ready to go back to work.  That will really help to put some normalcy back in my life. 

I am so very lucky to have the friends and family I have.  Every one's thoughts, prayers, cards, gifts, calls, meals, and support has meant so much.  I realize just how lucky I am to have such amazing people in my life.  I definitely could not have made it to the CANCER FREE point without all of you.  I plan on having one huge celebration this weekend with my friends...first for birthdays, then for this great news.  I am lucky for every day I have, and I do not want to waste any of them.  I have a lot of life left in me and a lot of things to accomplish in the many decades I still plan on being around.  So, take a moment and celebrate life.  It means so much.  I raise a glass to all of you for your love, understanding, patience, and caring.  Thank you from me and my family.  I am so happy knowing I have time now to see my boys grow and change.  That is truly a blessing.

Happy Birthday to Me---36 and Cancer Free!!!!

I am a huge celebrator of birthdays.  Always have been.  I actually have a birthday week dedicated to multiple celebrations of my birthday every year.  Tim hates it...he is not a huge fan of birthdays.  But, I was raised to celebrate the day I was born in a big way.  This year's birthday is even more special. This year it starts cancer free.  No more chemotherapy and just one more surgery in a few months to look forward to.  I would like to say I got my present early the day I finished chemotherapy.  Unfortunately, cancer still looms large in my life.  No matter, I am still celebrating starting fresh.  A new year, a new age with no cancer.

I now will crave birthdays because they will symbolize another successful year cancer-free.  I am so ready to put all the pain and battle of breast cancer behind me and move on with my life.  In my mind, I will be able to do that more effectively next week.  July 20th I have my PET scan.  This is to determine if any new cancer growths are anywhere else in my body.  Until I finish this test, I still wonder and worry.  I am confident the results will come back cancer free.  I just want the proof before I shout it from the rooftops.

I started my celebration yesterday with my yearly dinner with my pharmacy girls--Diane, Jennifer, and Elisha.  Dinner and celebrations at the Melting Pot.  I love when we get together.  It is a double birthday celebration, as Diane's birthday is the day after mine.  July is just one big party.  Our big double birthday party will be July 23rd on the Betty Bus, surrounded by friends of our present and past.  I am resting up for this big party.  I can not wait to see some old friends, and I definitely do not want to slow down the party.  Tomorrow we have dinner plans downtown(without children--WOW) with friends and family.  I also share my actual birthday with a dear friend, Gena Evans.  We have made it tradition to celebrate together.  Adult couples going out for dinner downtown.  Sounds like a great way to end my birthday tomorrow. 

Tomorrow is a celebration.  I have made it to a glorious 36 years of age.  Last year was the worst ever so I have big expectations to number 36.  Change as well as some normalcy is the theme for this year.  I want my life back, but with personal improvements and challenges.  Every year, actually every day is precious.  I celebrate them all and plan on many, many more.  Thank you all for sharing your life with me.  Your love, support, and concern have truly warmed my soul.  I am so very blessed. to be starting new, with  friends and family by my side.  I will only get stronger--mentally, physically, and emotionally.  

Week by week I am slowly seeing progress.  I have very uncomfortable neuropathy that I have been battling for months since the Taxol.  Slowly, it is getting worse and not better.  I finally broke down and called the doctor.  Great news, it only gets worse before it gets better.  I am looking at about 3-6 months for my body to fight with neuropathy.  It severely affects my ability to walk.  It also makes me break down in tears with each flair up. I find myself only comfortable in bed, definitely no walking.  Hard to get back on your feet when they hurt so bad.  I will start some medicine to help with the neuropathy as well as a good old anti-depressant because it has become obvious I need one.  No shame in getting the help I have been avoiding for a while.  Hopefully, these 2 new therapies will help me overcome my cancer recovery much faster. 

So, Happy Birthday to Me!!!  I am 36 and proud of every day.  I await thousands of more days ahead.  Until then, I am enjoying my time with Tim this week while he is on vacation.  We are planning on a short trip to St. Louis and then Chicago for a few days.  I plan on enjoying this time as a family as much as possible.  Every week I get a little stronger.  I can not wait until the time in my 36th year when I am there---back to normal with no lingering effects from the drugs.  I know it is coming soon and look so forward to that.  So, I wish myself and everyone else out there a happy, healthy birthday full of love and friends.