I now will crave birthdays because they will symbolize another successful year cancer-free. I am so ready to put all the pain and battle of breast cancer behind me and move on with my life. In my mind, I will be able to do that more effectively next week. July 20th I have my PET scan. This is to determine if any new cancer growths are anywhere else in my body. Until I finish this test, I still wonder and worry. I am confident the results will come back cancer free. I just want the proof before I shout it from the rooftops.
I started my celebration yesterday with my yearly dinner with my pharmacy girls--Diane, Jennifer, and Elisha. Dinner and celebrations at the Melting Pot. I love when we get together. It is a double birthday celebration, as Diane's birthday is the day after mine. July is just one big party. Our big double birthday party will be July 23rd on the Betty Bus, surrounded by friends of our present and past. I am resting up for this big party. I can not wait to see some old friends, and I definitely do not want to slow down the party. Tomorrow we have dinner plans downtown(without children--WOW) with friends and family. I also share my actual birthday with a dear friend, Gena Evans. We have made it tradition to celebrate together. Adult couples going out for dinner downtown. Sounds like a great way to end my birthday tomorrow.
Tomorrow is a celebration. I have made it to a glorious 36 years of age. Last year was the worst ever so I have big expectations to number 36. Change as well as some normalcy is the theme for this year. I want my life back, but with personal improvements and challenges. Every year, actually every day is precious. I celebrate them all and plan on many, many more. Thank you all for sharing your life with me. Your love, support, and concern have truly warmed my soul. I am so very blessed. to be starting new, with friends and family by my side. I will only get stronger--mentally, physically, and emotionally.
Week by week I am slowly seeing progress. I have very uncomfortable neuropathy that I have been battling for months since the Taxol. Slowly, it is getting worse and not better. I finally broke down and called the doctor. Great news, it only gets worse before it gets better. I am looking at about 3-6 months for my body to fight with neuropathy. It severely affects my ability to walk. It also makes me break down in tears with each flair up. I find myself only comfortable in bed, definitely no walking. Hard to get back on your feet when they hurt so bad. I will start some medicine to help with the neuropathy as well as a good old anti-depressant because it has become obvious I need one. No shame in getting the help I have been avoiding for a while. Hopefully, these 2 new therapies will help me overcome my cancer recovery much faster.
So, Happy Birthday to Me!!! I am 36 and proud of every day. I await thousands of more days ahead. Until then, I am enjoying my time with Tim this week while he is on vacation. We are planning on a short trip to St. Louis and then Chicago for a few days. I plan on enjoying this time as a family as much as possible. Every week I get a little stronger. I can not wait until the time in my 36th year when I am there---back to normal with no lingering effects from the drugs. I know it is coming soon and look so forward to that. So, I wish myself and everyone else out there a happy, healthy birthday full of love and friends.
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